Today is your special day to sit back, relax and allow me to bring a smile on yours. Wishing you a very happy birthday, dear mom! Not a film star, not a musician, not a celebrity and not a famous personality either. You are the super star in my life. Happy Birthday. I know of at least one person who has been influenced greatly by you… Me! I love you, mom. Happy Birthday!
Happy birthday! Today we celebrate the blessing your life has been to me and many others. After all, it your Birthday, the best day of the year! You have been such a strong support to me. I will never be able to thank you enough for all of it. Happy Birthday to the best mom in the world and the prettiest lady I have ever seen!
But, what I know is that we all love you. May God bless you with love, care and warmth. Happy Birthday, Mom. I am glad to have you as my mother. Happy Birthday mom, I love you. May you have a sweet and joyful life ahead. I love you, my love, my mother. I will always remind them of you my dear mother.
But there are so many more reasons you are an important part of my life, and I want to wish you a happy birthday. I love having you around. You have been and continue to be a blessing in my life. The absolute worse day of my life. It was a Friday. I found out at work that I needed to leave and go straight to my mothers. I knew in my heart why I was needed. My husband with me hand and hand. See there is no comfort for me anymore. I long to feel my mothers arms embrace me, kiss my cheek and say I love you, Cha.
- Congratulatory words to mom on Mothers day 12222.
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- Federal Special Education Funding Down By 11% Between 2010 To 2013 (OPEN MINDS Weekly News Wire).
Would it be just once more to satisfy me till my turn comes, I think not but it sounds convincing. Oh how that would break my mothers heart. I hear her say Cha you are strong, you can do this and everything will be okay. See my mother and I have struggled all my life and she struggled all of hers. We were always hit with difficult tasks it was just our way of life. A force to be reckon with and love as fierce as blue embers of fire.
She taught me everything. She was my mother and my father, my best friend, she was my rock. Aside from her mother dying, my grandmother. See my mother was very young when she had me so all three of us women had a special bond. At times when I look back I can see my mother May of thought I looked at my grandmother as a mother and probably so when I was a child. It was the comfort that my grandmother could give to both my mom and I. When my grandmother passed a light went out in my mothers eyes.
After 12 Years my Mother is Still Everywhere - What's Your Grief
It never came back. I looked and looked for it but it was gone. My mother was very much alone in her mind. Oh how I wish I could of filled some of her emptiness but she was consumed by griefs ugliness. Slowly I watched my mother decline. I never knew her pain as I know it today. It was just an emptiness that I suppose is always going to be present as far as I can tell. My mother was in pain meds and heart meds. Lots and lots of meds. The pain meds brought the landslide down. I knew when I started to see my mother take more than prescribed and nod off there was a big problem.
When I would try to talk to her about it, she would get angry and irritated at me. Then some days she would see they were a huge problem. She got herself in this pill circle if you will. It was terrible and heart breaking to see my mother like this. The Monday before my mother passed, she called me early early morning. As she spoke, she spoke about being with my step father all weekend. Alarmed I jumped from bed, jerked on my clothes, called my oldest daughter to keep my mother on the phone till I could get there.
I arrived and called for an ambulance. My mother was very mad at me. I knew she was over medicated but I also knew there was something else going on with her. I told them to stop or I would do whatever I had to do to make sure they were stopped. These women were talking out of their heads. I left and spent that afternoon calling every doctor and pain clinic within a 60 mile radius.
It was exhausting but I was able to stop some of the pills from reaching my mother. I was then faced with what to do with her doctor and meds. I was scared now of what it may end up doing. Would I be pushing my mother to get her pills from the streets. So with that I did nothing else. Even though I was haunted by the fact I knew something bad was going to happen to my mother. My mother called me one last time. She was still not in her right mind. I kept telling her something was wrong. I was so scared and I told her so. This day was different. A few days later that dreadful Friday came.
My whole world as I knew it changed. The holidays were the worse. I constantly thought about my mother and what she would be doing if infact she were here. Idk if I can ever be that person again. I can tell you I will strife to be but in case I can not please love me anyways. Love you my dear sweet mother. I carry you with me always. Your there for ever goal made or medal awarded to your grand babies and every tear shed out of joy or sadness. Your still very much apart of me.
That I can never be stripped of. Your post reminded me so much of my mum, especially about when your mum used to always encourage you and seemed so strong and able to face any problem and so gave you strength, too. My mum passed away in April of I have thought of her every day since then, perhaps for a moment or two or sometimes longer. She was my rock in life! Nothing seemed quite as bad when I shared it with her.
She had so much common sense and she seemed so strong. I was not able to tell her how much I loved her when she was dying. I was frozen with fear. I managed to tell her that I would look after Pinky for her Pinky was her little pet bird who she loved. I hope she knew that I felt the same. I am lost without her. She, like you, was my mother and my father rolled into one. I miss her oh, so much. Thank you for reading. Dear Delyse, I entirely agree with you about what you wrote about the pain and emotions.
My Mum died on April 4, , the day of Easter. I can feel the sadness, the pain and the sorrow invade my body and my soul. This morning, I woke up suddenly because I had a nightmare. This nightmare was destabilizing.. She was my rock in life, my best friend, my beloved Mum. To my eyes, she was the most wonderful Mum in the world. She was here when I was crying, she was here when I was happy…. It may sound childish.
She passed away 4 years ago. I was there when she was dying at the hospital. I was in shock for months… I miss her so much. I can feel your pain. Thank you. I read what you wrote with tears in my eyes because I so related to so many things you said. My dear mom passed on Feb.
I just want to sleep, but wake up crying every morning realizing I will never see my best friend again. Friends and family say all the right things, but it all feels so empty. I am because my Mom made me that way. She was my rock and anchor. I hope so. So I have to honor her wish to go on and live a full, happy life.
You are so blessed to have a husband and children. I never married. They love me from afar, but its not the same. Hug and kiss your kids everyday because your Mom lives on in them as well. Please email if you get a chance. Watching you take the last breath Cremating your body thereafter Collecting your ashes and Scattering them into the sea Have broken me…totally! Having nurtured me with love and care Unconditionally… For more than half a century Your absence makes me drown In an ocean of tears….
You mattered most to me But now nothing matters…as much! I lived with mum for 59yrs, I was her soul buddy. But how can I throw them out, they once gave her life meaning and joy, they were part of her? I talk out loud to her, and she tells me to carry on, and do all those sensible things we ought to for our health and joy. So I honour her by trying to do so. But our time has not yet come, so we must struggle on, and we will find some joy again.
Surely we owe them that. Our mums, dads, sons, daughters all loved us — and would WANT us to carry on, as we would them if died. So the best thing to do is honour them by carrying on — and being healthy, doing the right thing, and being an example to others who will also experience shocking losses. Hi Bryan, Thank you for all your heartfelt posts. I so relate to your experience.
I lived with my Mom for 50 years. Everyone keeps telling me to move out of our apartment, which I will eventually, but for now I need the familiarity of the life we had together. Yes, it is so painful at times to see her things, but also a comfort. I will however with the help of a dear family member purge her things a few months from now. I will of course save the favorite, sentimental and special things.
I encourage you to do the same. I do think that it will help foster the feeling of moving on. My darling Irish mother died of cancer 21 Sept My problem is that I lived with her for for 59 yrs, I had a great life with her, she allowed me unlimited freedom to date women, travel, study, work where ever I wanted it to. My father died when I was 16, so I kind of just slipped into the role of her breadwinner, even though she had a small pension. The depth of our love for each other was bottomless, so now the depth of my grief is acute.
She left me her home, as I was the primary carer for two painful years, even washing her when the time was near. She was a proud Irish woman, only trusting me, her son, to take care of all her needs. Although, living in her home, now my home, was comforting at first, so many of her things cripple me with sad memories, all her belongings. I talk to her over breakfast and during the day and night.
Keep fit and healthy. Each day is consumed by just existing and eating something healthy.
The only respite is sleep, then the nightmare begins when I wake to a new day. I just hope the pain eases over this year, feeding myself with positive thoughts that I can go on. I believe I can, and know I can…. I must — for her. She saw me take my first breath, I saw her take her last.
Your words really touched me, thank you. I lost my darling Irish Mum on 30th October Still devastated and so lonely without her. She was my best friend x. Hello Bryan, i read your post, thank you for sharing, i instantly related to your words. I too was there for my mum at the end and felt her last breath blown onto the left side of. I dont live in her home and miss not having her home to visit. Mum was my rock, such a selfless person and struggled for years with her illness which was agony to watch. I always said if she can bare it then so must i. I nursed others over 30 years but nothing prepared me for the pain i have inside at witnessing not only mums struggle and awful circumstances but also her painful passing which nobody should have to endure in this day and age.
You sound a good honourble son and supported your mother, be proud of yourself. Please feel free to messge me. My mother passed away on Nov. I feel a loss so deep that I ache for somehow to find a way to cope with the loss. I have recently start attending a grief support group.
This has helped just to talk to other who have experienced the same type of loss. Grief will eat you alive and you have to grieve. Each of us have to grieve at our own pace and how we choose to grieve. Just as long as it comes out and your dealing with it.
One thing I will never forget was how much she loved me. She would tell me all the time. I know no one will ever love me like my mom did with all my faults. She would always tell me how pretty I was or I had nice legs and face.. Everyday is a struggle cause I miss her so much. I just wish I could go back in time and re-do so many things. I know I will never find anyone that loves me more than her and who would have gave her life for me, no questions asked.
My dad was an absent type of verbally abusive male, it was my MOM that loved me.. I miss her so much. I still rememner every detail about the day she got sick and the day tht she died, my whole life fell apart, she was my best friend, i cry myself to sleep pretty much every night still now even though all the years have passed, i never recieved any councelling, i never had anyone i could talk to, 17 years of bottled up emotions have really got to me this year… my dad died a year after my mum too so i had to deal with losing my dad while grieving for my mum, how do you even get over something like that at such a young age???
At any age! But it will take time, as your new experiences will slowly help fade the pain of the crippling sorrows. The acute pain you feel now will prompt you to take a new path, it will be very difficult to take those small steps, eating well, a little exercise and trying to get some sleep without meds. And then exploring new hobbies, writing, like here on this forum is healthy, maybe some painting and playing music. No one can live a full life without these two experiences. In a way losing my Mum, after living with her for 59 years, has being the biggest shock and turning point in my life.
I am, and believe I will, begin to increasingly thaw out to experience some joys in life again. I hear my mum inside of me, she speaks to me, encourages me to get on with my life, eat, sleep and be healthy…do all those little chores around the house that need doing…. Hi My mum died October 13 The October time is so painful. I was so angry that his death now could morph into overshadowing the grief for my mum the strongest most admirable woman I know.
Then on 3 March my best friend rang for me to get to her house as Conner her 7year old son had been hit and killed by a car at km per hour. I stayed for 3 months to help my friend but I do know that you have to be able to grieve for everyone individually. I have never spoken to anyone about my experience with losing my mum. If anyone has any ideas I would really appreciate it. Wow — Thank you all for sharing so honestly how you are working through and struggling with your grief. My mom passed on September 25th Nothing prepares you for the loss of deeply intimate relationships such as a parent s.
I do, however, take comfort in a conversation I had with my dad when I was 7 or 8 years old. I was just coming in to understanding what death was and I came to him in tears asking him what will I do if something were to happen to him and mom? One day, while sitting bedside with her in August I thought back to last Christmas.
I realize their will be plenty of emotions within the upcoming holiday season. So the truth is that life really is short and clearly our own time will pass. The question remains each day: How shall that time be utilized? I will always treasure my trove of moments with my parents and through that I will manage the grief.
I know my parents want me to smile, laugh, and have happiness in however I define it. I am 15 years old. I lost my mum when I was 8 on the 10th of November so in 9 days. It will be 7 years. I now deal with severe grief, depression, death anxiety, and social anxiety. It literally causes me pain to think about her no matter how hard I try to think of it in a positive way. I just feel so tired and helpless and like no one around me can relate. I am so intrigued with death yet so fearful.
I genuinely am so confused and just tired. I want her to come back. I just want her to come back you know? I have a 12 year old girl — that my mum never got to see — see died when I was 3 months pregnant. When my mum died I lost my rock, I had my marriage breakdown and have been at the depths of depression and despair. So do not have that crutch to lean on. For example adyashanti, rupert spira, jed mckenna to name a few.
I still miss her with all my heart — I have my beautiful daughter to pour my love into and who loves me with the intensity I love my mum. We are complex, biological creatures — this biology and evolution leads to sometimes overwhelming emotional pain when our loved ones leave us. I wish you all the best in life, as I know you mother would have too. Please think of what she would have wanted for you to be able to find some joy in life and feel and live after she left.
The fact that you love her so much means that she would want your amazing deep love to go on into yourself and to others. I hurt for you! I lost my dad when I was 11, and it was so hard! I was angry and sad and closed down for a long time. I am 43 now, and my mom just passed away, and the grief is deeper than words can express. You are not alone! I encourage you to call out to Jesus. Give it a chance. You might think you are talking to the air, but He is real and He loves you. He knows your pain, and he wants to walk with you through it.
With him, you are never alone.
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Your life has a purpose because He created you. He gives comfort to broken hearts. If you have a Holy Bible, start reading the book of John to learn more about Jesus and how you can get to know Him personally as your Savior. I will pray for you, Cody Day. You mum lives in your heart now. And she is at peace, where ever she is. You were, and are, still very, very close to her. You and your mum must have loved each other deeply.
After 12 Years my Mother is Still Everywhere
But, as hard as it is now, you must honour your mum by carrying on with your life — bit by bit. You will begin to feel better, sobbing and crying a lot helps for now. Dark thoughts of suicide will only, as you said hurt your dad and others, but also your lovely mum. She wants you to live your life here now, on Earth, as she did. You seem a remarkably young and intelligent and sensitive person. You wrote on this forum. You have a lot to give. For now though, take small steps, eating well, a little exercise, and sleeping well.
And chat more on this and other forums, it helps. Bryan What a beautiful response. I did agree with the part of God though. I hope you continue to advise people on this site. I did not agree with the part of God though. Correction on the God part. My mother died eight years ago this past August. And now, I have been told I will lose my husband within the next few years.
I want my mother. But now, facing the loss of my husband, my grief at not having her with me almost overpowers me, at times. I always thought they were tears of sweet happiness at her memory. Now, I know they were still tears of deepest grief. Your post has so deeply resonated in me. My mum who was only 65 passed away last year on the 23rd October. I am dreading that day and the 1st Anniversary. Since autumn started creeping in I find myself in a bit of an emotional mess.
I miss her so deeply every day and heart just feels sore and sad most of the time. She meant the world to me. No amount of time will ever change that as my love for her will never lessen. Thank you! Thank you for this! I am ok. Thank you for your beautiful words. My Mom passed on March 6, and my dad passed the spring before.
I thought Spring would be toughest, but I was so wrong. I was so numb the first year after she died.
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Each year after gets harder and harder. And what makes it particularly painful for me is my younger brother. Oh, Dee, I can really understand your grief. Mine is similar, my darling Irish mum died of cancer Sept 21 We were soul buddies, and loved each other deeply, hence the grief is painfully deep. I was her primary carer for two painful years watching her slowly die. She saw me take my first breath, and I saw her take her last breath on her bed.
I now write from the same bed she died on. Surrounded by her belongings in the house she left me. And my brothers and sisters did nothing to support me when she was dying. And now they just get on with their lives without a sad thought which baffles me. But not for me, I feel dead inside, only existing to eat, sleep, trying to keep myself decent, and a little exercise. All joys in life seem pointless. So what can I do? The pain is immense, but I remind myself that this excruciating pain will force me to be creative in some way, writing, painting, playing music.
But not a present. One day, yes. Looking forward to sleep. All I can do at the moment is try and eat well, little exercise, some sleep without meds or booze, and try to keep the house tidy, and read or watch a funny dvd when I can. I drink plenty of herbal teas, quietly write about my grief, and read these forums. So it was nice to read yours for me, you made me feel less alone.
I hope you feel less alone by reading this. I will recover, and I know you will, too. Please just take care, and keep writing and about it, and maybe talking to someone who knows the agonizing pain. I shared my birthday with my mother, October 1. My mom passed in March , and I find there is an ebb and flow to grief, time does not really heal all wounds, the grief just seems to change.
When my mom died I felt an emptiness that I cannot describe, like a hole in my soul. I knew my life would never be the same, I was I will be 45 tomorrow and I miss my mom. My birthday has never been the same. My life is forever changed. I just accept the good days with the bad and talk to my mom daily. But all our moms would want us to live our lives and be happy. I try my best, but life is not the same. Tomorrow I will celebrate my 45th birthday and remember my mom, she would have been My mum died suddenly on 14th May , she was 30 years old.
I was 4 years old. She died 5 days before my 5th birthday. My mum passed away of a brain haemorrhage. The painkillers is for my head and body pain that I get daily. Is this part of my hydrocephalus as it affects me mentally as well as physically, or is this some kind of grieving thing? My mom died 8 years ago unexpectedly and I was surprised at how efficiently and neatly I got through it all — handling many of the details with focus and grace and then focusing on taking care of my baby in ways that I believe would have made my mother proud. My first child was four months old at the time of her death and I had my second child two years later so I guess I just focused on them at the time.
Tonight I found myself unable to sleep and googling her manner and cause of death and wondering why her pain medication for serious disease was so mishandled she died from a prescribed fentalyn patch which is a really dumb use of time because what does any of that matter now? I finally got my act together as she would have said and focused on dealing with my grief a way more productive endeavor and I found your article.
It helped a lot. So thank you. My sister died on 27th oct, while she was just 16yrs old. Even though this article is about grief for mother, I felt that this is the same feelings I wanted to write for my sister. I miss her like crazy and time does not help. More than that no one can help you cope up with the grief except the immediate concerned family and not friends, not even close relatives. After some time they start saying that it happens, you should move forward only because they no more feel like talking about the grief.
It will be three years October 7th that my mom died unexpectedly. I think we all deal with it differently. I was very,very close with my mom. I am very grateful that I had so many wonderful years with her. But I think of her every day. And when I wake up at night I think of her then too. I feel so sorry she had to leave so suddenly. I do have a lot to be thankful for though. But every October 7th will be a replay of how I suddenly lost my mom.
It will be three years October 7th that I lost my mom unexpectedly. I think of her every day. I still wake up at night thinking of her. People keep telling my mom would not want me to be unhappy.